complete random thoughts about my now.

i think about some people a lot...every line is someone different...i can't always say and do what i want so i have to get the thoughts out of my head somehow...

i want to tell her that i know she lies...a lot.
i want to tell her that i love her...beyond the love i feel for most others, into a place that i can't describe in words.
i want to not love him, to forget him, to not miss him at the times where no one else would be right.
i want to know that i mean more than she does...even though i'm not sure i actually want to be more than she was.
i want to know him, beyond the messages of random facts and genuine stories that have filled my days with laughter.
i want to heal them, even if that means inflicting myself with all the pain they feel.
i want to make him happy, and i have no idea how, because he has no idea how and i want to fix that.
i want to tell him that its going to be okay...that in time the hurt will ease.
i want to tell her that this her life, and to not waste it complaining over everything she thinks is wrong with it.
i want to talk to him...in a way that will not only make him hear, but listen.
i want to hug her, and make her feel like she deserves better...because she does.